The French Nosegay quilt

After all this time I finally got to work on my french nosegay quit. It's one I put off working on because I had another quilt that wasn't done. Now I started on it a few months ago and it's all in one piece ready to be quilted. I haven't chosen a style of quilting yet, and I will have to make the trek out to the shed and try and get to the roll of quilt batting   to be able to cut a piece so it can go with the top and backing to the lady who does the machine quilting.

  I never thought I'd get it done. I have one other one somewhere that needs to be cut and sewn, but for now this will be it.

Except for the project I will be working on for charity. I will make a Texas Star quilt top and have it machine quilted and then give it for a charity raffle to help someone get medical attention. It is what I can do and I feel it's a worth wile cause. So I shall begin that quilt top soon.

One of my own

Some years ago, I was doing porcelain dolls and using other peoples molds. At one point I decided to try my hand at creating my own doll. So I sculpted the head/shoulder, arms/hands, legs/feet for a doll. Not a big one mind you but about 16" size.

  I really worked hard to create this doll, and after problems and more, I finally got a head I could live with. I painted and china fired her features, after pouring,cleaning and firing the first step. Then, I made her a body and dressed her. I am sorry to say this is a one of a kind as the mold was distroyed in the last move about.

  While she isn't perfect and not eveyones cup of tea, she is worthy of note. A little homely, but on the pretty side, and what  I can say is that she is mine. I created her. And there will never be another like her.

  So, my little prudish miss, shall live on in her mint green and cream lace dress, designed just for her. Even if I had tried to create another, she would have been different still.

  So my little lady stands alone, and that's not half bad either.

Added touches to my Christmas tree

I found some more bronze ornaments and have added them to the tree. The tree also has bronze birds as well now, and the cats have already tried pulling them off the tree. There are also green and cream feathered pieces . Joann's has a huge sale and the reindeer came from there. I also found these really long strands of bronze, that look like ice-cycles. I also brought out the sled I had tucked away.

Sometimes the best is saved for last. Enjoy!

Decoration everywhere

  I like to decorate everywhere, a couple of times a year. Halloween, Christmas, and easter, are when I tend to do a lot of decorating.

My door wreath carries the bronze theme and lends a sparkling greeting to anyone who comes to my door durning the holiday season.

  The mantle and coffee table/end tables also get decorations, even though they will be rearranged by a certain black fuzzball. He thinks he can do it better, and I am forever picking things up or recovering things he has removed. If it's got feathers, he thinks it's his.

  I really enjoy decorating, and have the uninterrupted time to do as I please. By hitting the sales, I can afford to indulge my decorating. My bedroom also gets an extensive amount of decorating, although not for the holidays, just by the seasons.

  The bathroom carries a major theme of mermaids, with wall art, paintings and a fabric mermaid that presides over a corner all her own.

As the season come and go, so to will Christmas. But for now I shall enjoy my decor, as well as share with any who come to view it here. Maybe you will be influenced by my designs, and use some of my ideas in your own decorating for the season. So for this bronze, green and cream season of 2008, I wish you all a wonderful heartfelt, christmas blessing. And may your new year be a joyous one.

That time of year again!

  Well it's that time of year again. We will be decorating, baking, wrapping, and in general... going nuts. My favorite thing to do is getting the tree up. I have been decorating in different colors and motif's now for a few years. I stopped doing the family tree when I no longer had a family to enjoy it.

  Anyway, I love decorating, and as an artist it's something I do very well, for the most part. Last year right after Christmas, I started to search out bronze ornaments, during the sales. I was able to pick up a lot of different designs for just a fraction of their original cost. I also decided to use a kiwi shade of green and cream colors to accent the bronze I was finding. There were several different shades of bronze as well, which gave more interest to what I would be doing.

  I also found bronze berries, flowers and leaves, as well as lovely green velvet holly leaves in the right shade. A cream flower, as well as bronze poinsettias, would make lovely focal points. I also found a few glass ornaments like the slice of pie, mushrooms, "orange" slices, and large kiwi green icicles. I use a lot of bronze wired ribbon in a couple of different shades. 

  The flower and berry "nosegays" are a favorite of mine and I always make up a few each year. I like to have birds in my tree, but this year there are large bronze butterflies. A real find and most unexpected. I also was able to get 2 strands of cream pine cone lights, that are wonderful mixed into the other colors. There are bronze pine cones as well.

  Around the bottom of the tree are the "unbreakable" ornaments. Those are there for the adventuresome kitties that always find their way into the scheme of the tree decorations. They like to think they are one {tree decoration} or that it's all just for them to play in. Either way, I have the plastic ones on the bottom row. Most of the time they don't look to bad either. I also like to find small little balls to go towards the top of the tree, and anywhere they fit, that larger ones don't.

  I also have a strand of green lights and a strand of orange lights. I was hoping for bronze, but the orange lends its-self well to the color scheme. As you can see, not all ornaments have to be little/large balls. And no you don't have to have garland or tinsel. The tree topper was a plain rusty looking snowflake. I added the glitter, and finding bronze glitter was not easy.

  I still need to make a tree skirt, and the stocking that will hang on the fireplace mantel.

I like to get my tree up by the first of Dec. and down by the new year. All in all this tree is a keeper!

And more done

This is what it will look like when I am done with it. It's coming along, but why o why do I always pick the hard ones to do? lol. This is not an easy pattern to create. I'm ending up with a really mis- alined square. There is lots of room to square it up thankfully, but it's still a mess until that process is completed.Mostly bias problems, and any quilters out there will know what I am talking about. It will still make for a nice quilt when I am done, but 50 squares? I've only finished 12 so far, and I must get back to another project. So this will have to wait for a bit. I shall do a few and then work on something else. In time it will all get done. I just hope when I am sewing all the squares together, they line up right.

At Last! The French Nosegay Quilt

I wanted to start on this quilt many times in the past, but I was trying to finish up other projects and quilts before starting on something new. And so my Dresden Plate Quilt is finished and now at long last..... {drum roll please}..... I can start on the French Nosegay Quilt.

  It is a bit tricky, but with care I should be able to get it all together, and in one piece. The backing on this quilt will be a deeper yellow flannel. The background to the right here seems to be a bit washed out, but it is a pale yellow.

  It shouldn't take to long to piece all the squares. Well, with fifty of them it might take a bit.

  But I am up for the challenge, and really looking forward to it. I have no real idea how long it will take me and I will be working on other things as I go along. I have several items that must be finished, with deadlines to meet, and people looking for the end results.

  I enjoy making quilts, and when one is done, there is a real sense of having done something.

What is it?

  Have you ever wondered about all those self help books out there? I had a conversation with a friend of mine a couple of days ago, where she talked about some self help books she had been reading. One of the things she brought up was pertaining to Negative thought, and does that effect your life? Or the jest of it anyway.

  I was reminded of the book about the power of positive thinking. More or less the same thing, just a different angle. My feelings about it was the idea that if your busy searching for negative things, or your letting anger rule your emotions, you will only draw, attract, and find anything and everything that has to do with anger. In other words.... look for the devil and that is all you will find.

  I have never understood jealousy. It is one emotion I never let take hold over anything. I confront it, dive into it, feel it, and then it holds no power over me. There is nothing, although not  easy to do, about it I care to deal with. I can't for the life of me see how someone could live so many years, and not exercise that ghost. It lies with-in that persons fear of confronting their own demons. I have seen people go to great lengths just so they could ignore this problem.

  The real problem is that it will spread though out every faucet of your life and color everything you try to do. Until you confront it, and deal with it, it will continue to effect all aspects of your life, and every creative project you attempt.

  I don't like dealing with jealousy. It's a nasty thing to have that in your face. I can't imagine living with it for forty one years.

  Well, the moral of the story is.... face your own demons, and leave others to face theirs.

  Well, that's it for tonight, I'm yawning so much I have to take it to bed. But... I'll be back!

Burning the Midnight Oil

  Ever wonder where that phrase came from? It certainly calls it like it is.  I don't know how many nights I have been up way into and past the midnight hour, and certainly burning that midnight oil. Of course nowadays it's call electricity. But one burns it just the same.

  Which brings me to that question. Are you a night owl, or a morning lark? Most night owls burn that oil at night, but very few larks do. It can be difficult meeting up these two differently geared people. I am a night owl, spend many a night up late, but as I get older I tend to be getting up earlier as well. So there just isn't much sleep there at all. Who needs it?

  One thing I have found about the midnight oil, is that I think clearer at that time of night for some reason. I'm more creative, cover more ground and work out more problems then at any other time. I have even been seen to be cleaning house at that time of night. So what is it that tends to make the differences between the two? I'm sorry, I haven't a clue. I only know that there is a difference. And it tend to work for me best at night.

  I don't think it really matters about the two, except sometimes no matter how hard you try you just can't quite make the other person understand you. And you don't quite understand them.

  I have often wondered if there was a special time of day or night, where all the powers that be seem to have everything flowing in the right direction for whomever chooses to tap into it. I know there have been times that I just seemed to connect into something where all the answers were, and all the ideas could be found, and the creativity was piled around like so many jewels waiting for someone to pick them up. I help myself when this happens, and it happens ever so  often in that magical midnight oil time.

Inspiration... where does it come from?

What do you get inspired by? Almost everyone is inspired by something... be it music, a painting, a picture, nature,resources {like magazines, books, the internet} and often just plan seeing someone else's craft.

  I had the pleasure to see something I just completed, inspire someone to try their hand at creating with something I had used. I don't create, just to show you how great and good I am. That's not me. I create to inspire. I hope that by something I do, others will watch and learn, and then try it out for them selves. There is nothing better then doing this as far as I am concerned.

  Where do I get my inspiration? That's not easy to answer. Sometimes, it's something I see in a picture in a magazine, or looking at other peoples crafts. Maybe all of it isn't to my taste, but sometimes there is something there that sparks an answering response. 

  The creative urge is a powerful thing. Ignore it and you lose. Run with it, and you never know what will come out in the end, but whatever it is, it's bound to be something worth having been created. When I am inspired to do something, I have to go with it. If I even think about doing something else, it's an uphill battle, that I always lose. So I always "go with the flow".

  Often daydreaming brings inspiring thoughts. I've had music do the same thing. One has to let go of preconceived notions and let the mind wander. They call it "thinking outside the box".

Throw the rules away, make the feet big and the head small on that doll, is it your Aunt May?Paint a purple sky, and see what lives under the bridge there. Use everything you can, every stitch you know to create that quilt. Make the water flow and part for you!

  I can't teach you how to be creative in a few words, or show you all the avenues of inspiration. You will have to let go and look at everything with less control, and more of whatever it is you like most. Then see where it will take you.

  I can bet you will be surprised.... and inspired yet again to newer heights. It's just that simple.

Take that leap of faith in your own creative mind....and see where you land. Maybe down a rabbit hole? lol.

Creativity...Does it supply or drive you?

Isn't the mind a wonderful thing? So many channels, so many avenues one can take, and none lead to the same place, even when two people are thinking alike {and that's not a bad thing either}. There is always that little bit of difference.

It's what makes us different from each other, and a good thing to as we wouldn't be able to deal with a hundred others just like ourselves, and then where would individuality be? I for one am glad there is only one of me. I like being me, and as me, will leave behind the traces of things I've created in my lifetime. So when the end comes, I don't walk thought the pearly gates all pristine and perfectly groomed. I want to slide in on my butt, and be able to tell the powers that be...  I used it all! Every bit of creativity you gave me or I managed to add to, is there.... in my work, my art,my life. Accessible for everyone to see hear or read. I have nothing left.

  That is my life goal. Accountable to no-one but myself. I'm not perfect, but no-one is, so I refuse to allow anyone into my life, who places blame or doubt on me for themselves.

  It's not " let them eat cake:, it's "let them be accountable for themselves."

  Well I have a lot to get done in a day, but as always, one thing at a time. Count it a blessing one can use their creativity to work on multi-levels of problems at once. That to is part of being creative, and from time to time needs a house cleaning, to keep from being driven by other then our goals. {One reason we tend to overload and become frantic in nature to complete everything at once.} We often forget that the process of creating is in it's self a goal, and the completion there of is another. In other wards stopping to smell the roses... or in  this case enjoy the "creating" of the project, is as important as the completion of the project.

This is I believe a reason artists are in a class unto themselves. Not better, just different, in thoughts, and deeds. A lot of the time it's hard for one who isn't creative to understand what we need , want, or are driven by to create.

  I ran into a problem with someone who was close to me, where they couldn't accept, I had the right to be creative. Because I was older, and had done many things already, they selfishly wanted to deny me the right to all that had gone before them, so they could clam they did it first. It wasn't important who did what first, or for that matter what was done. It should have been... I did it my way, this is how I completed this, and this is the result, and I am happy with it. The two paths only crossed because we were related, and for no other reason.

  After all this time, I have come to realize, I can only answer for me, and I am not accountable for those related to me. If the path they choose is strewn with jealousy, and unaccountability then they have my pity, but nothing more. I waste no more time on what they try to attribute to me. It's not my problem. For all the world they can choose to blame me, and try to shout to everyone around what they believe to be true, but again... it's only their opinion, and nothing more. My rights are clear and my own, and nothing they do or say will make it any different.

  The biggest difference I can see between myself and this person, is I do not belittle, condemn , or most of all judge others. I try to keep things to "in my opinion", and not make statements about the other person, unless they are something good, encouraging or helpful. We are all allowed our own opinion. Just don't try to make your opinion law over everyone else, and making statements as such is not productive. That way, it's meant to be destructive, and of no help to anyone, except to bolster up the person doing it.

  There are times when someone is on a level of denial that is harmful to others, so what do you do? I can't change that person, and I'm not accountable for that person, even if I care about them or are related to them, it's not my place to step in and "make it right". I may warn others if I feel there is a reason for possible harm, in my opinion, but not in a way to condemn that person and not to the whole world.

  My self worth is not decided by any one else. Just that simple. You decide for you... and I'll take care of me, and what I do or don't do. This is a statement of fact, not a confession. So get your big girl panties on and deal with it. Once again, I've been there before you and that doesn't make me wrong, or mean, or to blame.

  You most often complain about that which is really wrong with yourself. The other person has nothing to do with it. They just happen to be there in your way to where ever it is you want to go. They have rights also. Make room for them, and you make room for yourself. Help them and you help yourself.

  And that as they say, is the rest of the story!

What drives you?

  From time to time I ponder on things, like... which is more important... imagination or knowledge? I don't think I've ever read Einstein's answers about that, but it does pose a real mind bender. What do you think? Can you have one without the other?

   I believe the two go hand and hand and fuel each other. I don't think you can have one and not the other. I know many times it is the knowledge of what I am trying to create, that pushes me into using my imagination to complete what I was trying to create. But without that beginning bit of knowledge, I could not have gotten started.

  Is one more important then the other? I don't think so, but that's just my opinion and your, welcome to it to do with it as you please.

  As I looked back over my life, I know I really loved being creative. Born an artist and I will die one. One of the hardest roads to travel. For those who are trying to write good books and get sold, they run a close second in difficulty to making a living as a Artist.

  So am I a writer, or an artist? I've  been in Women's Day magazine, the miniature magazine, a second miniature mag that I forget the name of. I finally got my cover with Doll Costuming.

 I've sold over a hundred painting which are scatted all over the US. A six foot by five foot mural hanging outside the base commanders office in an Air Force base in Ca. Painting in private collections, that are still there. Art work on an Air Force base publication in Ca. Dolls that sold at auction for in the thousands, which I made, for charity.

Toad-ally Tricky!

I couldn't resist making up this piece for a Halloween decoration. But she's so tricky... uhhh... different? I still have to make her witches hat, but you have to love this toad-ally wrong girl who won the Miss Trick or Treat contest. How did she do it? She wears black taffeta bloomers, and a crow print deep red dress. Over this is a black leather looking, net trimmed, pinafore. I made up her broom by cutting some broom pieces off of a small fan shaped broom and re-binding them together. I hear it can stop on a dime, and is the fastest ride in town. But I've not tried it of course, and have to put that down to her-say.

  All she needs {she says} is a pot to "cook" in and her hat. Maybe a cat....naaaaaa. Hummmm, I wonder if this is Miss Frizzy-bottom? I haven't seen her for days, and she has a real perchance for getting her spells all wrong. This would be the first time she ever won a contest.... So, I don't blame her if she wants to stay as Miss Toad-ally Trick or Treat!

Mark it strange!

I have had some very interesting things go on around me from time to time, but this one you have to put down as strange.

  Several months ago, I lost a finger off of one of my dolls. A one of a kind piece, and there was no way to replace it. The doll is an artist's doll of a fairy. I looked high and low and searched for several days. Since then I've vacuumed the floor several time, and moved things around. Still no finger tip. Until last night. I had vacuumed again and was cleaning up, when I saw something on the floor. Right out in the middle and just back a bit of the doorway {where I had just vacuumed} . No way could anyone miss that, if it was there when I was vacuuming.

  It was the long lost finger tip of the fairy doll. Now she can play her flute. It looks a bit the worse for ware, as if another fairy had used it for awhile, and then just returned it. No joke!

I have glued the finger tip back onto the doll and thanked the fairies for returning it. For in truth, that was the only way that finger tip could have just appeared in the middle of the doorway like that. You would have seen it a long time ago, if it had been there. It was not I can assure you!

  Just mark it down as strange and wonderful. I've had help from the fairies before, finding lost things. In Ireland, no-one would think twice about this story. I for one believe in them.

Fall is here!

This is the first year my trees didn't get frost bit before they could change color. And they are doing a wonderful job this year. Everyone has a favorite time of year, and mine is fall. It seems as if the earth is saying good-by as it slowly goes to sleep till spring. The play of colors are at their best. A riot of color, like no other time as if it was the last hooray for the year. I hope you enjoy the picture, I sure am enjoying the real thing. From a Burr Oak to an Aspen tree, and that red Virginia Creeper I love the color.

Enjoy!

The Dresden Plate

Just a quick note. I have left my Dresden plate quilt with a lady to have it machine quilted. I was pleased to hear she not only liked it, but even complemented me on my work.

  I have chosen an acorn and oak leaf pattern to be used to quilt the top to the bottom. The center of the plate will have the acorn and the oak leaves will spiral outwards from there into the plate color changes. There will also be the oak leaf and acorn motif in the border. I am excited to see it finished. You will be able to see the design on the back as it is a solid white.

  I like acorns and oak leaves. Just a fancy of mine. So when I get it back in a month or so, I'll post pictures so you can see. Now I can move on to my French nosegay quilt, and a couple of smaller ones.

Moving on!

I do not dwell on something that has no resolution. I have found it is a waste of time, effort, and energy. Not to mention a major drain on ones emotional being. I am sure many of you will agree with me. If I thought for one minuet, there was really something there to share, I'd wait it out and see what was to come.  I often get what was a couple of words, in the form of a statement, and nothing in the way of action to even offer any kind of hope or show of what was stated. In other wards, nothing was there to back up what was said. Years of nothing, to prove those words were true.

  Were it me, I would have been finding a way to back up what I said. Words with nothing to show the meaning is true,are just empty words.

  How many of you would have wanted a relationship, but it turned out to be so one sided, as to be nonexistent? Your told don't call, I'm busy. When I can get around to you {and that wasn't often} I'll call you. I don't call that any kind of a relationship, short of one sided at best. I couldn't share what  was happening in my life, they weren't interested. That really doesn't make a person feel very good about themselves. And that is pure negativity, at it's most destructive.

Oh ,I forgot, you did have the privilege to hear all about their problems. So your short time on with them, was all about them. No wonder they don't know you.

  As I get older I find myself becoming more introspect. I watch and learn from other people, but most of all I apply the 10 years in therapy, and all I learned from therapy. If you work at it, and I went into it with an open mind determined to come out of it, with a much better understanding of what was going on in my life and with me.

  The Doc. stated to me once, he had never had anyone not only learn, but apply what they learned.

  With that in mind I feel confident to move on, and and face what is to come, alone.

Alone is not a dirty word. If some of you have bought into the reasoning, that no-one should be alone, try this on for size.

  I am alone because......  I enjoy the quiet.

                                            I have the time to do what I want to, without interference.

                                            I ow no-one my time, effort or energy.

                                            I can do as I please, without having to ask permission of anyone.

                                            my time has value.

And so on. I am sure you can come up with many, many more. These first few, are the ones that people who do not have any of this and wish they did, will try their best to make you think they are not good for you, or it's something you shouldn't be doing. Trying to shame you into forgoing all the above, and making them the director of your decisions.

  Devious minds can come up with many things, and over the years I have bought into it all. 

  "If something is worth doing, it's worth doing right." That also includes.... using what you have, and are to the best of what you can be and do. I am alone, I will use it to the best of my advantage. I do not need to fill the space with empty offers. They most often hide, needs of someone else's desires, and use what I have, that they most often want.

  Show me something of worth for me. If I am exchanging something of value, then do not offer me something of little or no worth. And my time is of value.

  With that in mind..... may you use your time wisely. And if you are alone, reach out and embrace it, explore it... you will find riches beyond belief.

I dip my pen, in the pool beside the quietness of one.

Where the soul knows peace.

And the mind knows freedom.

Deirdre

The Keltic Knot is a Memoir

Basically of my life as I see it and remember it.

Definitions of a Memoir:

  A notice of something remembered or deemed noteworthy:

  An account of transactions or events written familiarly.

A biographical notice or autobiography

Recollections of one's life

Worthy to be remembered 

A brief entry in a diary

A written representation of facts made to a person

To cause to be remembered; to record;to hand down to memory by writing.

The power,capacity, or faculty of the mind by which it retains the knowledge of past events or ideas; that faculty which enables us to treasure up and preserve for future use the knowledge which we acquire.

Recollection and remembrance are exercises of the faculty memory,the former being a calling to mind, the latter a holding in mind; while reminiscence always, and recollections often, are used of the thing remembered.

The above provided by the New Webster Encyclopedic Dictionary.

 I provided this as a way of explanation of this blog. What someone gleans from my memoirs, be it helpful or just entertaining is purely personal on their part. I am not some kind of monitor to everyone else's life. In other words it's not my place to tell anyone what they should or should not do. I can only control and answer for my life. If I choose to share my memories on line, and I felt this was a wonderful way to reach many people, not just one person, then I have the freedom to do so.{And just for the record- there have been people who have conveyed to me how much they enjoy reading this blog}

Someone was thinking, I wrote all this just for her, against her, to show her in a bad light? 

When will you wake up, and realize, what I do, say ,think, feel does not revolve around you. Neither do I need you to tell me what I can or can't do. I did not ask you to monitor me or my life.

  What I do, say, think, feel, where I go, choose to do or not do, is not up to you. Never has been, never will be your call.

  I would think you would have better things to do, then to continually criticize me.

At the start, you jumped right in with negative remarks, and you continue in the same vein.

Is it so very hard to say something nice? Or at least try to convey your remarks in a more positive way. Must you tear everything apart, to suit your fancy?

  So far I have not done this to you {and don't go looking for what you think is the same as you have done to me, as you have so far not asked a single question about anything you have read on this site. By way of explanation, you might have found out something completely different then what you thought.}

You are not my judge, jury,confessor,confidant, or do you even know me. I asked for a year, I got a short six months. A lot has changed sense then. You asked about none of that, nor anything else for that matter.

 You have offered me nothing but to criticize what, how, and when I do anything, and it's not even  your call.

This is why I have kept my distance.

  I wanted something better, with more meaning, between us.

I told you once, life that is in the past, has been lived and cannot be wiped away just because you don't care to look at it, or face it.

I can live and be and do as I see fit, just as you may do the same for you.

I never tell anyone they have to do as I say, and that applies to you as well. I have told you many times, if there is something I share with you that you find of use, then I'm glad, use it if you so choose." I can tell you what I think, what you do with it is up to you."

I do not conjure up some kind of illusion, and tell everyone it's a rule they should follow.

This is no confessional. And you only dwelt on what you perceived to be a " communication of  frustration," and your judgment of giving people the wrong idea.

Who asked you to judge me?

As I have told people read, enjoy, if it helps you or enlightens you in some way, then I am glad I shared my MEMOIRs. Because I do not have the ability {nor care to for that matter} to monitor everyone who comes and reads what I write, neither am I responsible for what they think.

Writers, write stories real and imaginary every day and they are published, and read by many people. How can you possibly apply your ideas to these people? It doesn't wash, and it doesn't apply to me either. It's your own personal idea about writing, not any kind of rule everyone should apply to their selves.

For the rest of you, As I have stated before, I am sharing the benefit of my knowledge, my personal understanding of what my life has been as well as what I have learned. If it helps you I'm glad, if you enjoyed reading this, I hope it went a long way toward a better day for you.

My memoirs are here for you to read, and I for one will not judge you, for your opinions.

We share one common thing.... the freedom to do as we see fit. In other wards, the freedom to decide.

I choose the road less traveled by.

May the road you choose suit your hearts desire.

I lay no claim to being anything other then what I am, and my life has been full at times distracting. But I have achieved many, many things of note. I do not feel the need to drag them all out to display them in front of you as a way of proving how great I am. I am just me, old fashioned, down to earth, and straight from the heart.

To everyone who has read this, this will be the last time I will address this issue.

I have other things I prefer to talk about here. Thank you for your indulgence. I hope I haven't wasted your time, as I am sure I have wasted mine.

May your life's story be worthy of at least a footnote in heaven.

Blessings be,

Deirdre

A look backwards in Time

  I sit here this morning, looking backwards, over the years,, seeing all that went on in my life, and I have to wonder, just how important family is to a person. I was taught it was very important. But is it really? As nothing, or no one stays the same for their whole life, I have from time to time removed myself from my family {and I mean MY family- i.e.: the daughters I gave birth to} so I could get breathing room from them, and they could have the space to become what it was they wanted. I had a very controlling mother, who was always interfering with my relationships with other people. Later on, it was my daughters. I was not going to become like her, so.... I backed away from the girls thinking, they would understand. HA! I forgot a couple of factors in all this. Not being there to defend myself from anybody's implied remarks, would lead to the wrong idea.

I guess they thought if you could get others to agree to their warped misunderstandings, it would make it right.

  It becomes very interesting to stand there when you try to reconnect, to see just what they have decided. No matter it's not the truth. They have told the lie often enough they believe it themselves. A little bit here a little bit there, and they think they can make it be so. Well, don't believe for one minute this will work. Maybe if they were to go around telling the lie enough to all your friends and everyone they can, some people would believe it {my mother actually did this to me when I was a teenager, with all my friends.}. However, your true friends and those who care and really love you, won't listen to such nonsense, because they have been there and know you.

  Well, my mother got away with it, when I was young, because no-one would call her on it.At a later point in time, a friend of mine did call her on it. She flat out told my mother it wasn't right what she was doing. It just didn't matter to my mother, whom she was talking to, any of my friends were fair game for her lies.  I learned as a teenager not to introduce my friends to her. When I did it was more a test of the friend, to see how she would handle what she was told. Needless to say most of what my mother ever said was colored to prove something, that wasn't true.

   So then the grandkids come, and she has this "desire" to raise another child. They wouldn't let her adopt any kids {you can guess why} so what do you do? Oh I'll just take my daughters child.

 I won't go into all the details, or what all went on afterwards, to much water under the bridge.

 In trying to salvage something from the wreckage, she created I was surprised to learn some of what I did find.

 One, the only one in the family who did not have a major problem with jealousy was me.

Two, the only one who didn't want to control everything was me.

Three, the only one who cared was me.

Four, guess who learned how to be really cruel, and it's wasn't me.

Five, who wouldn't try even years ago, to make right a wrong..... I have tried, so it's not me.

Six,who wants to be of more importance then the rest of the world, Hay I just live here I don't want to control it.

Seven,Guess what you call people who do all of the above {and especially against one person}.

Hummm.... does it have something to do with that animal that with horns and a tail and goes Moooo?

Eight, just incase you missed the above answer I'll tell you. "Bullies". As I am the one getting the benefit of that treatment, I can't very well be one.

Well you get the picture. I don't argue with people any more, and any one who wants to? Sorry.  I'm busy. Am I bitter? I think they hoped I would be. lol Not happening!

I found a way to deal with all that, when I was a child, and grew up with that ability. I had to, as a lot of the problems started when I was a child. I don't know why God gave me the grace to deal with it, but he did, and no matter how much, or how often, or how those who do this wrong, try to make it a truth. They forget one thing.

The one thing that stands between right and wrong, and gives me the grace to forgive, also has forgiven me for being unable to right the wrongs.

The power of love, forgives.

The power of love endures.

The power of love sheds grace on anyone who dares to continue in the face of such adversity.

And that my dear family, is what makes me different from you, and sheds the light of truth on what you continue to do. It also frees me from any further attempts to communicate with you, or to have to stand and take the pain and heartache you have continued to overload me with.

I've made my last attempt, and now I can go and do everything I put off, or went without because I was trying to do for you.

I will remember this year as "sixty two and free of all of you." Yes, my birthday is this month.

For the first time in many, many years I feel happy inside. Habits will die hard, as I am use to worrying over family, but now I see this was another part of their game. That along with so much more will no longer be a part of my life.

  Don't you just wish, you could click a button and delete all that? lol. 

So where has all this led to? Well, it wasn't to vent on line, but rather to show by example what one can do when you face what your having to deal with, head on. I've always wanted to help those who like myself are dealt a raw deal {it only seems that way}. There is an old saying, "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." And I believe that to be true. I am stronger, and no it didn't kill me to see what all they wanted everyone else to believe. If they were smart they would have remembered, there is always the other side to the story!

Well enough for today, I think I said what I wanted to say, and I hope someone out there will read this one day and say.... I wish I'd seen this sooner.

Have a good day

Deirdre

Un-breakable Plates

I am so pleased with the way the Dresden Plate Quilt has come together at long last. I have finished sewing the squares together, and am now working on the border, that will be sewn on last. The quilt isn't as large as I had hoped it would be, however, it is still an heirloom, and finished will make someone very happy to have. {That's Tigger in the middle of it. Wait she was in the middle of it last time. She must really like it. Smoky is in the back left side.}

  Which brings me to the topic today.

  Must we as parents always, stand by our children? I'm old fashion in this respect, and believed that it was up to me to always be there for my daughter. I thought she respected, and cared about me. After all, after almost 40 years of "being there" for her, that was the very least I deserved.

  This past weekend, I got the message loud and clear, via her daughter {my granddaughter}, as to what she really thought all these past twenty years or better. It has been in her mind she would "get all she could get" from my mother then, show up at my place, and "get" yet again from me. To see into her mind and what she had been up to, was disheartening to say the least. I can't say what the worse was, as such words aren't allowed here.

  I am glad I am able to remove myself from her presents, once and for all, and not suffer what so many others have suffered, in the parting of the ways with their children and grandchildren.

Finding the grandkids are as bad, with no saving graces, because of who raised them, was very sad. I can't allow any of them to ever use me again, no matter the circumstance, no matter the problem, and no matter the cost to them. They have finally, burned the last bridge back home, and they are on the other side of a widening river.

  Am I sad? In a way perhaps. But as I foresaw this coming a long time ago, I was prepared. At long last, I was ready for whatever the outcome. It was up to them, and they let me way down.

So, what now? There are many ways to make ones life become fulfilled in this kind of instance. If this has happen to you, or you are about to experience it, take heart. It will get better so long as you actively make an attempt to create a place for yourself, other then in your children's or grandkids life. By now you should know what makes you happy, what you can rely on, and where to go for support. The wheel turns, and it comes full circle. Maybe not in the way you wished it had, but there were no promises tied in silver or gold bows when you gave birth to that child. 

  My advice- let it go, and move on into your own. You will be happier eventually. Most of all, always assess your relationships honestly, as best you can, so you can be even in a small way prepared. Not easy, but it can be done.

  Has my life ended, because of this? No! Not even in a small way. I have always lived, being and completing things unto myself. In other words.... I did it my way, and I survived.

You can too!

So, the Dresden Plate quilt almost complete, would have been child or grandchild's, and shall now never be a family heirloom. Someone's heirloom, someday, just not my family, as they wouldn't have appreciated it anyway. And I'm not to sorry about that.

Another Name for Dresden Plate

                                                                                     

{By the way, that's Mischief- the black and white cat, and Muffin from the first quilt picture. Hummmmm they really like my quilts.}

I found some more info on the dresden plate quilt. It is also called a Friendship ring and/or The Aster Quilt. I have no idea why the different names, unless it is because it's from different parts of the country and different names were used for the same thing, unknowingly.

  This quilt has been called a truly American quilt, and was made over three decades ago, in the heartland of America. I am sure you will have seen one or two at quilt shows in the past. What makes it so wonderful is the fact no two are ever alike. Yes the circle is there, but the color choices and placement is uniquely the quilters own choice. My dresden plate will always be,..... mine.

  No-one can ever reproduce it just quite that way. Fabrics are only made for a short length of time, and are also indicative to the time frame of when the quilt is made and the era it is made in.

 So that makes this special in more then one way, and an heirloom when it's finished.

  The actual quilting style, or choice of design that is quilted into and around the plates is also something that can and does change depending on who is making the quilt up.

I am so pleased to be able to work on finishing up this quilt. I thought about all the things I've made, and the things that are not done, or finished yet. I think they will never get done unless I do them, so here at the end of my life I am finishing up all the lose ends so to speak.

  I don't believe there would be any one who will do anything with what isn't done. I would hate to think of some of this being hauled to the dump, just because no-one wanted to bother with it, or worse cared enough to take what I started, finish it, and then use it. How very sad. It speaks a lot toward where this world is headed, with the generation that has forgotten it's roots, and carries the attitude of "I don't care"! "I am to busy with me, I don't have time for you!"

  When did the caring stop? When did we forget about our neighbor in need? When did family became a dirty word? A relationship built on self centeredness, greed, or the lack of genuine caring {translate to love}, is not something I will condone. I would rather be alone. It's sweeter, calmer, less disruptive, then to try to bear out the residual effects of family that isn't any more or for that matter never really was. I may have had two girls, but they have been lost in this morass of "me,me,me". One comes around only when she wants something, the other says I only want you around when I choose the time, and place, and that won't be any length of time.

  Well, I do know one thing. Reality bites! Someday it will come back to haunt them both, and in such a way they won't be able to stop, or change. It's a karma effect of their actions. The funny part is, I won't be here to make it up to me, and they will have to live their life, with that on their plate. Forever is a long time.

  The only way as I discovered a few years back, is to try to make things right with the person, and if they won't allow it, it frees you from what would have been. Something you might want to remember. But if they won't contact you, or  won't talk to you... guess what? They bought the farm baby. So just ignoring it, till the last second, then running in the door  "Oh I'm sorry.", won't work. Your a day late and a dollar short as they use to say.

  So, remember.... what you do will effect what happens to you, someday. And if you can't live with that, don't do it. No matter how much the world changes, this is a fact that has remained thought time. Look it up, history spells it out, again and again.

  OK... I'm off to work on that plate.

That Dresden Plate Quilt

After a long and not so productive spring, I did manage to get out into the sheds, where low and behold I found that Dresden Plate Quilt pieces I started so long ago. All the plates are sewn ready to be stitched down onto the squares. Then the squares will be pieced together and the decorative edging added. That will then be laid out on the backing with the quilt batting between. After it's basted together, it will be quilted and then the edging bound.

I am working on doing just that in between the doll clothes and the continuation of the sorting project from hell. I also plan on moving the Kiln up from the old addition so I can pour and finish some dolls.                                         

  Here is the Dresden plate in progress and oh.... thats Tigger. She looks a lot like my big gray tiger stripped in the other Quilt picture.  

I remember....

  As I sit here, sewing the binding down on my quilt {and you noticed I said MY quilt.}, I remember my grandmother doing the same thing. She was the quilter in the family, and made several over the course of years. She made me one when I was in Jr. high, and at that time I didn't really appreciate it. I still have it. A sunbonnet girl pattern, with fabric from some of my dresses ,etc. It was what one did with the scraps back then. You saved them up till you had enough for a quilt top, then you cut, sewed and stitched whatever pattern you had chosen into a warm comfortable quilt for your bed. You didn't run down to Walmart and buy a blanket, you made one.

  My quilt has sat for years. After I got it basted down about twenty years or so ago, I didn't do anymore with it. Instead I made and hand quilted a Texas Star for my oldest daughter. It took me 4 months worth of back braking work to make it, and I was so proud of it. I thought it was something special to pass on to her. It ended up being the dogs bed, where they peed on it, and then she threw it away. Words will never describe how that has made me feel. I doubt anyone could put words to what that was.

  Now, after all this time I am finishing my quilt. A Grandmothers fan, with embroidery between each color change, and lace around the outer edge of each fan. This was hours of work, and should have been finished years ago. Now that I am done doing for everyone else, I am finishing it at last. While it won't be quilted as much as what I might have done years ago, at least it will be finished. I think my grandmother would be proud.

  My great grandmother did crocheting. I can remember seeing her sitting in the corner of the living room, her hook flying as she made doilies and other things. I didn't know her very well, I was very little when she died. But I still remember her. Some years ago I won a Grange contest for my crocheted doily. I think she might have liked that.

  I have a Dresden plate quilt almost ready to have the blocks sewn together, somewhere out in my sheds. There are at least two other quilts yet to get that far. I hope to find them and finish them as well, so they can be added to the quilts from my grandmother and my grandmothers fan quilt. Someday, I hope someone will want them and take care of them, but certainly not my daughters. I don't see either one of them caring for anything I've made or done. Oh well, their lost, someone else's gain. And someone will think they have the find of the century in my treasury of quilts, and will want them. In the meantime guess who has claimed the quilt?

At least he won't pee on it!

Deirdre

Is Old really old?

Or are we just lead to believe, that past a certain age your "old". For me it's a matter of what my body is telling me today, and that depends on the weather. How can a body be a weather vane and how does one get there in the first place? Ask anyone who has had an injury and they can tell you if it's going to snow, rain, or be sunny. Today it's snowing, on and off. Will it never end?

  Maybe, if we all write ode's to the sun, or something like that, it will come out at last. I looked up at Glacier Park the other day, and judging from the white to the ground look of things, Going To The Sun Road, isn't going to be open for quite a while.

  So how is your 'road' today? Every wonder what life would have been like if you had taken that 'road less traveled by'? Is life so pre-planned that no matter what,  your on the road you were supposed to be on. 

  I really  believe we have this one thing guaranteed to us at birth. The right to decide. {Death and taxes are a given, but many don't think about this.} You make decisions everyday and many in a day. It's what separates us from the animals. They don't sit about drinking tea and making up their minds about that lion in the bush behind them. Its fight or flight, and that's it.

  I'm also wondering about what influences our decisions. We learn things, we live life, and what else? We see, hear, feel and think before we make up our minds. It's quite a process, and very involved, but is that it? What about that little feeling in the back of your mind, that tells you you've been here, done that before?

  I believe, that pure emotion is residual. Religion teaches us that love is forever. That is pure emotion. If love is forever then any strong emotional event in your life, will remain forever. The one thing you would carry with you, if you came back to live another life, wouldn't be memories. It would be emotions. That emotion might trigger the memory of what caused it. Love, hate, fear... all of those things would carry with it that feeling of having been here before and done that. 

  So if love is forever, and our souls can carry that feeling, then we would also have all the rest to select from as well. Your body is dust to dust and ashes to ashes, and next time you would have a different one. No memories, but pure emotion with the soul and this time maybe you'll get it right. It all boils down to learning. And learning is often triggered by emotions. The circle is complete, and the wheel turns again.

What have you learned in your lifetime? Is old really old?

Well, just my thoughts for the day, take it or leave it, live it or not. You have the right to decide.

As do I.

Blessing of a sunny day upon you,

Deirdre

How time flies!

When you're having fun, is the rest of it. But I wasn't having fun, just trying to stay warm, in this twilight zone of winter/spring, wait.... it's not here yet, time of year. Who stole the sun? I think I know every shade of gray one can find, and I'm tired of it.

  I was working on a new project last night, and really got tired of the silence. Often at night, {being a night owl, one works well into the night at your best creative output.} I burn the midnight oil. There is nothing to compare with that silence. Not a creature was stirring, except me, and even the cats get jumpy sometimes with the silence. So, I decided to run speaker wires down the hall to my bedroom. This would let me play my records and tapes, listen to the radio and in short, have something else stirring besides me and the cats.

  It took a couple of hours, but by the time I was done, I had sound in the room. Even got wires to the computer up out of the way as well. Now I can have something to listen too. The cats couldn't figure it all out, but throw a mouse for them and they're happy.

Another project finished, thats  needed doing for some time. Well, it just takes time.

  Ever get a notice to bring in your vehicle in for that x number miles check-up? I really had to laugh this time, because it was for my FJ's 5000 mile check up. I had to call them and tell them I was no where near that milage. More like 2000 miles. Good thing I got the extended  warranty.

  I started another new project. Something I've been wanting to do, just putting off. It took me awhile to gather the supplies {interesting how few needlework crafts are being done these days} as I had to order in the supplies. Not much around here in tapestry wool. But I have enough now to work on this new project. An embroidered knot garden. Not flat, but 3 diminutional. It's going in a 12" x 12" shadowbox with a glass piece insert. That's to keep a certain little black cat from taking off with anything he takes a fancy to in the box. I can't believe how much trouble he can get into in one night. Right now, he's demolishing a feather he stole from my supplies. So I know when I'm all done with that garden, it won't be safe unless it's under glass. Besides, it will keep the dust off all that fancy work.

  Did you know that's what they use to call it? Any kind of needlework, be it embroidery, knitting, whatever. It was referred to as fancy work. Of course, back then ladies sat around doing just that, and little else. Your corset wouldn't allow you to do much else.

  The little knot garden is coming along as they say. The four walls are done and mounted in the box. I'm working on the gardens now. Lots of different stitches, threads, yarns, and ribbons. Throw in a few beads, and its spring. I know you were wondering if I was just rambling, or what. I can honestly say its spring time in my garden. I'll post a picture when I'm all done. 

PS: That may be awhile yet. lol.

 Until next time, may your flowers bloom in May!

Deirdre

And Another one bites the dust.

I have a fabric stash, that a lot of people would love to get into. But I have it because I have all these ideas for gowns I want to make. I just finished another one tonight. Deep red over dress with a black velvet and brocade underdress. Even used some of that trimming that has been sitting and gathering dust. This is an early style, and simple, but the color really makes it stand out. I used an older dress that I needed to remake anyway, the lining from something I changed my mind about using, and the deep red/black thread material all together in this design.

  There's that old saying again. About using things up. Well, it works, and I have something really nice out of it all. I can't help but wonder sometimes what will happen to all the gowns, and dolls and beadwork etc, after I'm gone. Nobody really cares except me, and I guess that's why I'm doing this. For me, after all, as I am worth what I am spending my time on.

  Little black Smoke seems to like the feel of velvet and satin, as he will get right in the middle of it and hold it down for me as I work on it. I guess he thinks it'll get away if he doesn't. It's his habit of playing in the straight pins that worry me. So far he hasn't gotten 'bit' by one of those pins, and I don't want him too.

  Another thing he does, is take a big bite out of my tissue pattern when I'm not looking. Nothing like holding up the pattern to see a big chunk missing, and he looks so innocent. He loves paper, be it patterns, notebook paper,magazine paper or tissue paper, he will disappear it for you so fast. I've found the toilet paper all unrolled in a nice pile a couple of times now. What's really funny is to see him carry it off in his mouth with the roll unrolling as fast as he can run away .

  Nothing like a little furry imp to make your day. He still thinks the word 'no' doesn't apply to him. 

   Next up is cloisonné beadwork on a fairy costume. All done in green tones, with a bit of blue, red/pink and lots of gold. The fairy wings are deep green, and waiting to be decorated. This is going to be a bit of fantasy, and whimsy in the middle of hard reality.

I hope you can find something like that to do, when your reality bites a bit to hard. Its time to take a break from it all.

Until next time,

Deirdre

Do I sound distracted?

In a way I guess I am. It snowed again last night, and After getting the Belkin up and running I can't wait till tonight, so I can get the laptop doing it's thing. I can watch TV again. Yaaaa!

On top of that I am designing a new outfit for my Cissy, and it is taking some redesigning to make it work right. Then I'm also working on a red and black gown for me. I had to stop long enough to cut lining for it, and now I can finish the black under dress. It can be worn with a couple of different things, along with the red overdress. Lots of handwork for the over dress when I get to it and get it all sewn.

  I'm also trying to figure out how to run Dreamweaver, as I'm working on my website as well. So, yes... I am distracted. But there is an equal amount of things stacked up behind this lot, so I need to get done, and move on.

  One of the best ways to clearing the deck, is to get things into the bite size pieces you can handle. That way you don't get overloaded on any one thing. If you need to, make a list that is broken down into the parts you need to work with, and then list what you need to finish. You can check them off as you go, and that is another way to keep things moving.  You feel like you're completing something, even if you still have a lot to do on that project. I keep several things working at the same time and move from this to that. I don't get bored with any one thing that way. Often I have more then one project finish at the same time. Its kind of fun seeing it all come together.

  And just remember.

 "Where there is a will, there is a way!"

 If you want to do it, then you will find a way to do it. Suffice to say, if you really didn't want to do it in the first place, it will never get done.

Here's to your projects. May they be happy ones, that complete you, or your desires.

Later,

Deirdre

This takes the cake!

I was sitting here looking for something, the computer had its screen saver  going. Smoky jumped up and sat down in front of the screen. I have a screensaver running that is rabbits hopping all over the screen. On and off then they scratch, hop some more. I turn around and here's smoky chasing rabbits. His head is moving, following them as they move around the screen and off. He was trying to get behind the screen because he was sure they were there. Once in a while his paw would come up and he'd try to pin one on the screen. He couldn't figure out why he couldn't catch one. I've never seen a cat chase a screen saver before. This was a first. If you can visualize this, it should bring a smile to you.

Later,

Deirdre

Another step closer!

After another day of trying to get stuff done, I managed to get the wireless router up and running. Now the next step is getting the laptop connected into the wireless. With a little help from my cousin that will happen tomorrow night. Then the laptop will be up and running and I can watch TV from it. I go a snails pace at this stuff as I don't understand a thing I'm doing so good thing others do!                                                                                                                                                    

All those little things....

Why do we wait so long to clean up all those little things? Is it the time spent on each project? That would mean we are way to busy. Or is it loss of tools, or pieces needed to complete our projects? That means the safe place you put it in, has been moved or changed, and you don't remember what you did with it. {I do that a lot, when it comes to things that don't have a home yet.} 

Or is it that we are getting lazy? In other words it's just to easy to keep putting it off. I think the word here is 'procrastination'. And the old saying is "Don't put off till tomorrow what you can get done today." How much more would you get done if you did that?

  I like to finish things up, and the past couple of days have seen the end of several projects. It really feels good to get it done! Cleaned out a whole shelf in one bookcase, by finishing up those projects. I know in another month or two I'll have a new pile of unfinished projects, but I also know, I'll take time and finish them as well. Sometimes I have to just say ,no, you can't start anything else new till you finish those old ones. Dragging my feet I do take time and I contemplate the new projects I am going to start because I have finished these.

  Another old saying is "Nothing like the present  {time}..." to start, finish or do whatever it is you are thinking about. Sometimes, if I don't think about it and just do it, that helps to get the job done.

If you're putting off doing something because of cost... perhaps rethinking it, and looking for a less expensive way will let you get done with that as well. And if that doesn't work, then set aside a little each month, till you have enough. You know your working toward finishing, and one feels better about the delay.

  Well, now I'm off to start new projects. If only the rest of life was so easy, I'd be happy. Till next time,

Deirdre

The parrot needs a name!

  I forgot about her pet, that red parrot. He needs a name as well. Anyone got any ideas?

What do you name a bird, that talks back to you? Oh, I'm sure he talks. That is what is so much fun about 'playing dolls'. One can create the story line, history,names... everything is open to your creative touch. So rich a ground is one's imagination that there is no limit.

  I know pirates had talking parrots, but I can't remember any names. This is going to take some thinking.

By the way, the first thing Grace wanted me to make for her, was a nightgown and robe. As soon as it was finished, she grabbed it and ran off to change. It seems tight pants are not the most comfortable after all. And one needs a rest from high heeled, thigh high boots. I guess it was kind of like wiggling one's toes in the sand, to get out of them. Just plain wonderful!

Later then,

Deirdre

A name for the lady!

I have decided to give my new lady a name that befits her. She is captivating by all means, and by dress a swashbuckling pirate. So a little research, and keeping in mind all the glorious red hair, I decided to call her Grace O'Malley, "The Dark Lady of Doona". She is a pirate Queen, by all means, and as such will have lots of room for a wonderful wardrobe styled in the late 1500s. The real Grace even met Queen Elizabeth the first. I shall have fun creating that court gown. Her adventures will give her access to all kinds of wonderful fabrics and jewels. She even lived in a square castle in Ireland. Humm..m..m... I wonder if I can create a one or two floor castle big enough for her to reside in? I see lots of rocks in my future. But don't you think she deserves it?

   I am adding a drawing here of the real Grace meeting with Queen Elizabeth. Nothing like playing dolls to stir up research and creativity. They seem to always go hand in hand for me. So I'm off to collect fabrics and beads, to start that wardrobe. I'll post pictures as I go.

Blessing be upon you,

Until later,

Deirdre